@sween - Twitter Profile Analysis
Analysis of 200 tweets by Jason Sweeney, from 31 Jul 2021 to 21 May 2022.
Jason Permenter @jasonpermenter
Realizing Elon’s whole persona tracks pretty close to a complete fuckup who stumbled upon a time machine in the woods and ended up giving his younger self stock tips and championship stats.
Me: I don't know man, "the season of mutual oral sex" is not a great track name
Bryan Adams: ok smart guy what's your great idea?
Jelisa Castrodale @gordonshumway
Me: I really need to focus rn
My brain: Ok
Me: I mean it
My brain: I know
My brain: But imagine Donald Duck saying Sylvia Plath
Robert Evans (The Only Robert Evans) @IwriteOK
why yes i would like to adopt a tiny, semi-feral animal with a lifespan just a fraction of my own and then make it's continued survival the lynchpin of my mental health
Steven W Skinner @SkinnerSteven
“Oh hell yes” - Schrödinger, reading the first line of A Tale of Two Cities
peever ⛺️ @aaronpeever
*frantically flosses eyes before going to optometrist*
so weird staying with someone who doesn’t have pets. so you just… leave doors open? you just… put fragile stuff on low shelves? you let your food out of your sight??? an insane way of life
Scott Simpson @scottsimpson
Please, call me Scott. Scott+ is my streaming service.
Americana Mama @AmericanaMama_
Me: "Hi, I'd like to buy a magic bullet.
Bed bath& beyond employee: "Ooh, making some smoothies huh?"
Me: "no [clenching my fist] I want to kill a wizard"
Employee: [eyes going black] "Fōllōw Me"
Batman Off Duty @BatmanOffDuty
Take me down to the pair of mice city,
Where they have two mice; it's a two mouse city
Jason Sweeney @sween
“It’s St. Patrick’s Day, so excuse me while I Irish up this coffee.” [Fills mug with potatoes]
Retweets1 - scottsimpson
1 - electrolemon
1 - AmericanaMama_
1 - aaronpeever
1 - SkinnerSteven
1 - IwriteOK
1 - gordonshumway
1 - 5tevieM
1 - biorhythmist
Replies19 - RossFloate
11 - sween
7 - PenLlawen
7 - Notactuallyme
6 - katefeetie
6 - rynbtmn
4 - SeoulBrother
4 - Moltz
3 - antichrista
HashtagsNo hashtags found.
Mentions2 - @damselesque
1 - @stormcrowmanor