@sween - Twitter Profile Analysis

Analysis of 200 tweets by Jason Sweeney, from 31 Jul 2021 to 21 May 2022.

@sween twitter profile photo

Jason Sweeney

verified twitter profile @sween

limited edition, macaroni and glitter on construction paper.

11,015 tweets
124,411 favourites
<1 tweet per day
2007 since
269 following
4,375 listed
Toronto, Ontario, Canada location

Top Tweets by @sween

Jason Sweeney
Apocalyptic: an adjective describing the end of the world Apocalyptus: also describing the end of the world, except caused by koalas
21 May, 2022 - 11:45 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Technically, everything happens with seconds remaining.
11 May, 2022 - 11:59 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Happy Mother’s Day.
08 May, 2022 - 08:45 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Every morning my body was aching for no reason. So I started working out. Now I *know* the reason.
01 May, 2022 - 08:44 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Tina Fey will be joining season two of “Severance” as Liz Lumon no notes send tweet
26 Apr, 2022 - 10:57 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Just taking a short break from petting my cat’s soft head to see what’s happening on the ol’ Twitter. Wait. What? Oh. Huh. [Resumes petting cat’s soft head.]
26 Apr, 2022 - 03:45 AM UTC
Jason Sweeney
This bar is nice. @stormcrowmanor
23 Apr, 2022 - 01:08 AM UTC
Jason Sweeney
"Steganography" is the art of hiding a message inside another message. "Stegosaurusography" is the art of hiding an actual dinosaur inside a message. Don't... mix them up.
14 Apr, 2022 - 01:24 AM UTC
Jason Sweeney
My Salmon Power Rankings: 1. Cooked Salmon 2. Raw Salmon 3. Salmon-Man (superhero who fights wilderness crime by leaping upstream) 4. Jacob Salmonmann (ineffective secret identity of Salmon-Man) … 89. Smoked Salmon https://t.co/fKUWfaK9ba
06 Apr, 2022 - 04:15 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Smoked salmon is gross. https://t.co/C68ikibV04
06 Apr, 2022 - 12:07 AM UTC
Jason Sweeney
01 Apr, 2022 - 03:43 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Talking to people who missed the Oscars last night.
28 Mar, 2022 - 12:10 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
Putin, in some gold-plated bunker, surrounded by flunkies and yes-men, watching the Oscars: yikes
28 Mar, 2022 - 03:19 AM UTC

Top Retweets by @sween

Avery Edison
I feel awful asking, again, but I'm in crisis right now and could really do with your help. https://t.co/Y5RISxK66C
05 May, 2022 - 03:13 PM UTC
Jason Permenter
Realizing Elon’s whole persona tracks pretty close to a complete fuckup who stumbled upon a time machine in the woods and ended up giving his younger self stock tips and championship stats.
01 May, 2022 - 12:43 AM UTC
Me: I don't know man, "the season of mutual oral sex" is not a great track name Bryan Adams: ok smart guy what's your great idea?
19 Feb, 2022 - 11:34 PM UTC
Jelisa Castrodale
Me: I really need to focus rn My brain: Ok Me: I mean it My brain: I know … My brain: But imagine Donald Duck saying Sylvia Plath
07 Feb, 2022 - 01:07 PM UTC
Stevie Martin
my brain when writing an email
06 Feb, 2022 - 11:09 AM UTC
Robert Evans (The Only Robert Evans)
why yes i would like to adopt a tiny, semi-feral animal with a lifespan just a fraction of my own and then make it's continued survival the lynchpin of my mental health
16 Jan, 2022 - 06:51 AM UTC
Steven W Skinner
“Oh hell yes” - Schrödinger, reading the first line of A Tale of Two Cities
14 Dec, 2021 - 08:37 PM UTC
peever ⛺️
*frantically flosses eyes before going to optometrist*
30 Nov, 2021 - 03:36 PM UTC
so weird staying with someone who doesn’t have pets. so you just… leave doors open? you just… put fragile stuff on low shelves? you let your food out of your sight??? an insane way of life
28 Nov, 2021 - 04:21 PM UTC
Scott Simpson
Please, call me Scott. Scott+ is my streaming service.
11 Aug, 2021 - 08:08 PM UTC
Americana Mama
Me: "Hi, I'd like to buy a magic bullet. Bed bath& beyond employee: "Ooh, making some smoothies huh?" Me: "no [clenching my fist] I want to kill a wizard" Employee: [eyes going black] "Fōllōw Me"
24 Jul, 2021 - 05:43 PM UTC
Batman Off Duty 
Take me down to the pair of mice city, Where they have two mice; it's a two mouse city
20 Nov, 2017 - 08:36 PM UTC
Jason Sweeney
“It’s St. Patrick’s Day, so excuse me while I Irish up this coffee.” [Fills mug with potatoes]
17 Mar, 2016 - 01:56 PM UTC



63 tweets
122 replies

Twitter Client

155 Tweetbot for iΟS
37 Tweetbot for Mac
7 Twitter Web App
1 Twitter for iPhone

Tweet Times


Tweet Days



1 - scottsimpson
1 - electrolemon
1 - AmericanaMama_
1 - aaronpeever
1 - SkinnerSteven
1 - IwriteOK
1 - gordonshumway
1 - 5tevieM
1 - biorhythmist


19 - RossFloate
11 - sween
7 - PenLlawen
7 - Notactuallyme
6 - katefeetie
6 - rynbtmn
4 - SeoulBrother
4 - Moltz
3 - antichrista


No hashtags found.


2 - @damselesque
1 - @stormcrowmanor